Membership office
Sign your card.
Type a first name and we'll stamp it. You'll be a probationary member, pending first sweat. Download it, send it to someone from your gym, hang it on the fridge.
Your name stays in your browser. No member number, because we don't keep track. It costs nothing, and it doesn't require buying anything. The membership is a joke.
Benefits of membership.
- A card.
- The Bylaws, which you were going to be held to anyway.
- The right to file grievances that go nowhere.
- Standing, earned by showing up and making room. Never by time in the room.
Want the bulletins?
Separate from the card, and optional. Prototype pictures, cold test results and a real date when there is one.
Received. You'll hear from us when there's something real to report.
The card is free. The shorts are $68.
See the Standard Issue